


Set it on Fire

by Talvenhenki



Category: Star Trek: Picard
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Author is not fond of Bruce Maddox, Bad memories by Bruce Maddox, Baking, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Good thing he's dead, Hurt/Comfort, Panic Attacks, Surprise life advice by Elnor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-04
Updated: 2020-10-04
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:07:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26821888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Talvenhenki/pseuds/Talvenhenki
Summary: Baking brings up bad memories in Agnes. Cuddles ensue
Relationships: Agnes Jurati/Cristóbal Rios
Comments: 6
Kudos: 11





	Set it on Fire

**Author's Note:**

> I had a brief inspiration while rewatching Picard (to find some inspiration) and here you go, a bit of fluffy angst for you lovelies! Story was written very quickly and hasn't been proofread but who cares, sometimes we just need a little story to read.
> 
> You're welcome.
> 
> Also the thing they're baking is prinsesstårta, a.k.a a Swedish princess cake.

The mess hall smelled heavenly. A sudden inspiration had struck Cris on a particularly slow day and he and Agnes had ended up in the kitchen – Agnes hadn’t even known there was one on La Sirena! – baking something that smelled lovely and had a name Agnes couldn’t pronounce. Not for the lack of trying, though. It was the damned _Å_ – pronounced more like a long “o” sound – which Agnes kept messing up with an _A_. This was why Agnes had chosen robotics instead of linguistics. No confusing letters to mess up on. Piece of cake!

Cris set the emptied bowl aside as he made sure there weren’t too many air bubbles on the batter that he’d spread in the cake tin. Agnes took the bowl and scooped some of the left-over batter in her mouth as Cris put the cake tin in the oven and set the timer.

“There”, he said, “eight minutes and the sponge will be ready, and we can move on to the buttercream. But first the cake will have to cool down a bit.”

Agnes smiled and offered some of the left-over batter to Cris on the teaspoon she’d found. He tasted it and nodded his approval.

“Tastes about right. You can have the rest of that, though.”

Agnes scrunched her nose and giggled. “Thanks to you”, she said. “I’m complete crap at this. I only ever replicate my food. I swear, you must have some kind of a secret gift to be able to do _this_.”

Cris smiled and kissed Agnes’ forehead. “I got it from home. My mom, she always cooked and baked the best things. Though I must say, I haven’t cooked much for myself. It just never felt the same.”

“I still don’t get the part where you set it on fire”, Agnes said, giggling, and immediately regretted it.

A memory of another lifetime – of _Bruce_ – had hit Agnes with full force. He had replicated the ingredients and _set them on fire_ , as Agnes had called it. Or, in other words, had baked them into chocolate chip cookies. He had baked them, and they had kissed, and it had been one of the last memories Agnes had watched of them together before she’d _killed_ him. He’d even had a holopicture of it on his desk on Coppelius. Damn Bruce, that sentimental man who’d bled Agnes dry of her ideas and made her fall in love with him.

Well, not _made_ her fall in love, but that was beside the point.

Agnes’ face fell as the memory came to her mind. Something heavy seemed to have descended on her heart, as her chest began hurting. She absentmindedly rubbed on it, which caught Cris’ attention.

“Ags?” he asked, looking worried. “What is it?”

 _Ags_ , Agnes reminded herself, _not Aggie_. Cris would never, ever try to make her be something that she was not, for which she was immensely grateful. She blinked her eyes and cleared her throat to make sure she sounded alright as she spoke.

“I just…I just remembered a thing I did with Bruce”, Agnes explained softly, “and you know how my mind usually goes off on a tangent about things? Well, it reminded me of what I did to him and…you know.”

“Hey”, he breathed, “it’s okay. You’re our Ags and we forgave you a long ago.”

Cris pulled Agnes into a hug with one hand, while using the other to catch the bowl Agnes was holding and to place it on the counter. He rubbed Agnes’ back, holding her as close as humanly possible. Agnes leaned into the touch, glad to have Cris around to comfort her.

Something moved, scaring Cris and Agnes out of their thoughts. They let go of each other and turned around to see Elnor who had just entered the kitchen, probably lured out by the smell of the cake.

“I’m sorry”, he said, “were you having a… ‘moment’?”

Cris snorted out a laugh. “Kind of, _hermano_ ”, he said. “Were you lured out by the smell of us baking? I’m sorry but it’s going to take another few hours to finish icing it.”

Agnes was still blinking rapidly, still upset by the sudden memories. No matter what Cris thought, it wasn’t very easy for her to forgive herself for killing Bruce. A lump grew in her throat as Cris and Elnor talked about the cake and baking it.

“I need to go”, she choked out and stumbled into the mess hall and away from Cris and Elnor. The two stayed behind, looking at her retreating form as she rushed away.

“She seems to be in a lot of pain”, Elnor said and looked up at Cris. Frowning, he added, “you feel responsible for it, do you not?”

Cris sighed and ran his hand over his face. “That’s not helpful, kid”, he muttered, shaking his head. “Agnes is…she is very fragile sometimes. She blames herself over the stupidest things and sometimes the good things we do trigger the bad memories in her. It’s…frustrating that I can’t help her.”

“You should go after her”, Elnor declared. “A familiar presence can be helpful during our darkest moments. And besides, you will only overcome the bad memories by creating new and better ones. Now go. Don’t let her be all alone and in pain.”

Cris felt dumbfounded by this sudden declaration but found himself following Elnor’s advice. Before leaving him alone in the kitchen, however, he turned around and said, “Don’t forget to take the cake out of the oven when the alarm goes off. You can activate Steward to help you out with the icing. And remember to use the potholders!”

Elnor nodded, and, with that, Cris rushed to Agnes’ room. He found her, curled up on the floor, crying, with Emil at her side. She was having a full-blown panic attack, and Emil had activated as a good EMH would when he’d sensed her distress.

Collecting Agnes into an embrace, Cris began trying to ground her in order to help her calm down. He rocked her back and forth, guiding her breathing, and holding one of her hands. Emil stayed next to them to make sure Agnes wouldn’t accidentally damage herself. Eventually Emil decided Cris was doing good enough job to deactivate himself.

When Agnes calmed down, Cris cupped her cheek and kissed her temple. Her face crumbled and she began crying again, but this time it was not because of a panic attack. Her sobs were heartbroken and somewhat powerless, due to exhaustion, no doubt.

“I’ve got you now”, Cris said, holding Agnes close. “I’ve got you. We’ll get through this.”

“But how can we get over me _killing_ someone?” Agnes asked. “How can we ever get over _that_?”

Cris brushed some of Agnes’ hair behind her ear. “Elnor just told me that we can’t get over the bad memories unless we make new ones”, he said and gave her another kiss. “Good memories. And I was thinking we should start with that cake. Let’s make you forget all the terrible things Maddox has made you feel and enjoy our cake. And we can bake and cook until the memory of you and Maddox fades.”

Agnes looked up at Cris, eyes wide. She opened her mouth to protest but before she could do that, Cris went in for the kiss. Agnes grabbed his arms to keep steady, yet it was in vain. They both tumbled over, still holding each other as they broke the kiss to look each other in the eye.

“But what if I –” Agnes began but Cris shushed her.

“We’ve gone over this, Agnes”, he said, “and I’m going to say it again. I don’t think you’ll end up hurting me. And if you do, that’s okay because we will talk it out. What you did to Maddox was a desperate thing, a plea for someone to stop the Romulan plot you were pulled in. I will never blame you for acting out under Commodore Oh’s orders. Never, Agnes.”

Agnes blinked and sniffled. “And the cake?” she asked softly.

“In Steward’s hands”, Cris answered, smiling. “Elnor is helping him. It’ll be a great cake.”

“Then let’s go have a bite later”, she said, leaning her forehead on Cris’. “For now, let’s just rest here. Or maybe let’s get on the bed first.”

“Good idea”, Cris agreed, and lifted Agnes on the bed before climbing in as well. Steward could finish the cake for them while they had some well-earned time off.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments fuel my soul and bring warmth to the cooling nights!


End file.
